Megatolerance is a term that can be used to describe the traits found in many people who remain in unbalanced relationships, where there may be abuse or addiction present in their partner. Megatolerance may allow people to put up with more extreme behaviors than is healthy or beneficial. Lax or absent boundaries can lead to the allowance and acceptance of behavior that many people would find "dealbreakers," yet to the megatolerant individual, they are likely to be forgiven or overlooked. Here are 4 signs that you might tolerate too much in your relationship:
1. You tend to minimize or rationalize your partner's bad behaviors. You might find yourself comparing other people's behavior with your partner's in order to make your partner seem "less bad" than someone else. Surely you can find worse examples or abuse or hurtful behavior, but this does not mean that what your partner is doing is acceptable.
2. You are likely to make excuses for or conceal your partner's actions. This may be because you have an instinct for preserving your partner's reputation, or you might be concerned with your own level of shame and not want others to know what you are living with. You might even try to cover for your partner by taking over his or her responsibilities when he or she fails to honor commitments.
3. You might feel as if you cannot survive without this relationship, and thus are willing to drop matters of contention or argument to avoid rocking the boat. Ultimatums may fall by the wayside and your desire to have a relationship may override your intellectual knowledge that what you are enduring is not healthy.
4. You might feel guilty at the thought of might happen if you left your partner, and feel as if he or she isn't able to function properly without you. You may feel responsible for whatever may happen to them as a result of your breakup and feel unable to act as a result.
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