One day, I was sitting on my balcony, watching all the people on the beach when I catch some of them looking up at me. Then I get an epiphany, how do those people see me? I am a very large guy, decent looking, single, drinking a cup of coffee, wearing shorts and no shirt. After all I am in Florida and this is my place. But what do they see? Do they see a man that is an author, a baker, or a candle stick maker? Do they even think about me? Do they ask themselves "I wonder if that guy can give me some relationship advice"? Probably not. Do they form an opinion about me? Maybe so. Then it comes to me, why am I even thinking about them? What am I thinking about them? Well I am just wondering about them, but I don't know them from Adam. Do I even want to know them?
If you're lucky and meet someone smart enough to actually get to know you before making judgment on you, you are very lucky indeed. Those people are few and far between. I like to think I am one of those type folk, but I catch myself judging people before I know them, just like you do, so how do we avoid that? We start by knowing ourselves, and then we can start knowing others. We can begin to treat others in a way that will show them who we are and what we're about, before they have a chance to judge us. It is only when you know yourself that you can show your true self to another person. Then, you can achieve relationship success.
For example, I talk with a little southern drawl, I like it. It tells people I am a country boy, a good ole boy, a nice guy, which I am. I smile a lot, and I wear clothes I like. Most people seem to like me after a few minutes, but it is not just one thing I do, it is my attitude, it's positive. A positive attitude will take you far in life, and that is a fact. Nobody wants to be around someone down, someone that brings darkness into their life. People want to be around happy people.
Anyway, I have several friends and co-workers who think they know me. Well I have news for them; they don't have a clue about who I am, and never will. They aren't going to get that close to me. Yes they have seen me in several different situations, but they really don't know me, they only know how I act. There is only one person in this world (other than myself) that really knows me, inside and out, and she is the one I am going to live the rest of my life with. Together we will have relationship success. How do I know this? Because I was able to show her who I really am, and I know she can accept me for who I am.
If you are looking to spend your life with another person, here is great relationship advice. Make sure they know all about you, inside and out, and make sure you know them even better.
Monte Jamison, Author
© 2009
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